I came to only when the horned figure, still holding me close with one hand, started slapping my cheeks with the other.
“Hey, you, open your eyes! I need you alive! Man, why are you humans so fragile?!”
“O-oh…” I think my voice finally broke through. “What are you doing, you idiot?! That hurts!”
And on autopilot, I smacked the horned thing across the face—or whatever it was...
“You?! You miserable little human! Tired of living, are you?!” The demon grabbed my wrists again and shook me, snapping me back to reality.
That’s when it hit me all at once that slapping an unholy creature might not have been the smartest move on my part. I shook my head frantically.
“N-no… Not… tired… of… living…”
“Good!” The horned figure seemed satisfied with my answer. “So, you want to live?”
I nodded, swallowing hard. This was all so wrong. Instead of being dazzled by how stunning I looked in this gorgeous dress, like some fairy-tale queen, this… whatever he was… was insulting and intimidating me.
The demon pressed me hard against a massive set of double doors, clearly built for giants, so that the heavy, forged iron ring serving as a handle dug painfully into my back. He continued with a growl:
“I bet you want to go home too, don’t you?”
“Y-yeah… I do…” Of course I do. You’re not exactly treating me like a knight in shining armor, not like in the romance novels...
“If we can come to an agreement, I’ll send you back to where I took you from.”
I blinked. What could this monstrosity possibly want from me?
“What do you want?” I managed to stammer out, my teeth chattering.
“Nothing too terrible. As you can see, I’m not here to steal your soul, force you to serve me, sacrifice you, or spend a long, leisurely time violating you. I just desperately need to present a fiancée to my family right now to secure my place in the line of inheritance. We’re going to walk through there,” he nodded at the doors, “and I’ll introduce you as my chosen one. You’ll stay quiet, smile, nod, and that’s it! After that, I’ll send you back home. Got it?”
I nodded.
“Do you agree?”
I sighed.
“I didn’t catch that. Do you agree or not?”
“Do I even have a choice?”
“Of course. There’s always a choice. If you don’t want to help me, I’ll just leave you here and find another fiancée. You won’t be able to get back to your world on your own, which means you’ll be prey for the first demon who catches you. And who knows what they’ll do with your fate? Not everyone’s as kind as I am.”
“So, this is really the demon world?!” It hadn’t fully sunk in until now that I was seriously in deep trouble.
I glanced around. Heavy gray clouds hung overhead, not a hint of sunlight anywhere. A massive gray castle loomed nearby, where we were apparently bargaining for my life… Beyond that, I couldn’t see much past the demon’s broad shoulders, clad in black with a silvery cloak.
I swallowed the tears welling up. This was all… too real. I had to agree. At least this demon wasn’t asking for anything awful, and he promised to send me home. I just hoped he wasn’t lying.
“I won’t lie,” the demon said, as if reading my mind. “I give you my word—once I secure my inheritance, I’ll send you back home.”
With that, he pulled out a slightly pointed fang and handed it to me.
What?!
The demon grinned, and I even caught a glimpse of a new tooth growing in its place. Wow! What regeneration! Now I truly believed I was dealing with a being from another world, not just some prankster in a costume.
“Take it. It’s proof I won’t deceive you,” the horned figure said, placing the fang in my palm and closing my fingers around it.
I fidgeted for a moment and, since wedding dresses don’t exactly come with pockets, tucked the trophy into my bra.
“I agree.”
The demon flashed a wide smile, adjusted my hair, and yanked on the iron ring. The doors opened silently, ushering us into a vast, gloomy hall filled with horned beings in elaborate robes.
And then everything spun into a nightmare.
The demon dragged me by the hand, and the crowd parted to let us through. Good grief, what were they?! All of them towered over me by at least two heads, if not more. Their faces were ultramarine, burgundy, green—some even looked normal. But their eyes! They shot lightning bolts, leaving a smoldering trail behind us.
The demon hurried toward a throne where a majestic old figure sat, draped in a black-and-silver robe, with enormous, twisted horns sprouting from a balding skull.
“My Lord! I’ve fulfilled the terms of the will! Here is my fiancée! Declare us husband and wife!”
“What?!” I tried to yank my hand free, but the demon dropped to his knees before the old figure, pulling me down beside him. “What are you doing?! This wasn’t part of the deal!”
“I have to be married to claim my share of the inheritance, or these vultures will snatch it up! And being declared husband and wife in the demon world means nothing to you! Once you’re back in your world, you can marry whoever you want! All you have to do right now to get back is say ‘Yes!’ That’s it!” He whispered all this in my ear, wrapping both arms around me and pretending to kiss me passionately.
I hoped the audience bought it.
“Fine,” I whispered back. “But right after the ceremony, you send me home!”
The horned figure released me with a satisfied look and stared into the old one’s eyes. Meanwhile, the elder scrutinized me coldly as the other demons gasped, murmured, and whispered indignantly behind us.
“It seems your fiancée isn’t exactly thrilled about this upcoming marriage, eh?” The old one’s voice sounded more like a crow’s caw. “Where did she come from so suddenly?”
“Oh, we’ve been dating for a while now,” my demon replied confidently. “She’s just upset because we agreed not to rush the wedding. But circumstances forced our hand… She’s on board, just nervous. We spent half the day picking out a dress, got the best one…”
“Stand!” the elder’s voice boomed. “I want to get a good look at you.”
The horned figure jumped up, pulling me with him. I brushed off the expensive dress I’d just been sweeping the stone-tiled floor with (How am I supposed to return this to the salon now?) and placed my hand in the demon’s outstretched palm.
“What is your name, child?” The elder’s eyes bored into me, as if trying to turn me inside out.
The demon twitched nervously, and I felt a small thrill of satisfaction. If they’d asked him, he’d have been caught out—he hadn’t even bothered to ask his “fiancée” her name.
I coughed, dragging out the pause just a bit, then answered, humbly lowering my eyes:
“Ksenia. Ksenia Zarevo.”
“And you, child of the human world, are you willing to marry this rogue and troublemaker, that is, Myrt Vysokosny of the demon world?”
For a moment, a chill ran through me… But if this was the only way to get home, then…
“Yes, I’m willing.”
“Very well. By the power vested in me by the higher forces, I declare you husband and wife!”
Sparse applause, angry hissing, and hostile growling behind me made me shrink. It’s unsettling to feel hundreds of non-human eyes boring into the back of your head.
“In that case, Myrt Vysokosny is added to the list of heirs to Grenhem the Terrible,” the horned elder announced loudly. “And to you, newlyweds, I offer my congratulations. We’ll celebrate the wedding tomorrow. We could’ve done it today if you’d given me a heads-up, grandson,” he added with a biting tone.
I nearly collapsed, but thankfully, the demon caught me in time.
“What wedding?!” I hissed angrily. “You said it was just the marriage and that’s it!”
“Yes, yes, darling,” Myrt Vysokosny said, wrapping his massive arms around me. “I know you wanted to skip the celebration, but we must honor our ancient traditions.” Then he whispered in my ear, “It’s not my fault—you heard him, this was Grandpa’s idea. What can we do now? We’ll get through the wedding tomorrow, and that’s it! You’re free!”
Something about his “and that’s it” was starting to grate on me. But what could I do?