– No! No! No! No! No!
I peeked out from behind the pillar, nervously biting my lip. How on earth did the jacket—into which I’d slipped my confession letter—end up in the hands of the Humanoid, our stone-cold, emotionless crystal chemistry professor, instead of my Vadim?! The professor always wears that ridiculously perfect coat of his, not trendy jackets like the students! And why the heck did he even leave his stuff here when he has his own office?!
Watching Tarnovsky put on the jacket, I prayed for a miracle. Maybe a classmate would storm in, scowling, and demand the jacket back. Or perhaps the letter would magically pop out of the zipped pocket. Better yet—Arthur Olegovich would suddenly faint, and I’d rush over to give him CPR while secretly snatching my letter back.
But no miracle came. The Humanoid-Tarnovsky, now dressed, headed for the exit. Typing something on his smartphone, he slowly unzipped the pocket and slipped his hand inside.
That’s it. I’m done for. I’ll fail the exam. Get expelled. Crawl back to my hometown. Total disaster!
Feeling around in the pocket, Tarnovsky paused and pulled out my letter. A bright red envelope, unsigned, but tied with a satin ribbon. He turned it over in his hand, tapped it thoughtfully against his palm, then tucked it back into the pocket and walked off. And there I stood, still hiding behind the pillar, staring longingly at the door he’d disappeared through.
– Pasichnyk! – a voice suddenly barked behind me, making me yelp and jump in surprise.
– Lina, have some mercy, I’m already a wreck! – I turned to my friend, slumping in defeat.
– What, couldn’t sweet-talk Aunt Zina out of her spot?
– Worse, – I stared into her eyes, shaking my head, – Vadim didn’t take the jacket.
– What do you mean, not Vadim? Then who did?
– Tarnovsky!
Lina’s eyes nearly popped out of her head. For a few seconds, she processed what I’d said, then whipped out her phone and opened a search engine.
– What are you looking for?
– A cheap funeral home. I’m hoping I don’t get caught in the crossfire when he comes for you. I’d like to live a little longer, thanks.
– Hilarious, – I muttered, grabbing her arm and dragging her toward the cursed coat rack to grab our stuff and get out of there. I desperately needed something sweet to drown this stress.
– But you wrote Vadim’s name in the letter, right? Why worry?
– That’s the problem… I didn’t.
– And yours? – Lina was starting to grasp just how bad this was.
– Three times.
– That’s not good.
– Yep…
And Lina didn’t even know *what* I’d written in that letter…
So, let’s break this down. Vadim Adamovich, the gorgeous guy from my class, caught my eye from the very first day. I wouldn’t say I was head over heels, but out of all the guys in our group, I liked him the most. He had dark, soulful eyes, a handsome face, tall stature, and charisma to spare.
Until yesterday, he’d been in a relationship. When I accidentally found out he was single again, I knew it was my chance. Especially since Vadim had winked at me when we bumped into each other in the hallway.
I don’t know why I wrote what I did. Maybe it’s all those cheesy romance novels I’ve been reading. The letter ended up having… let’s say, a certain undertone. But I was sure Vadim would appreciate it. He’s kind of a flirt, after all. What can you do? Still, he’s cute and kind, always ready to help if he can.
But Tarnovsky… Arthur Olegovich, nicknamed the Humanoid for his icy demeanor and unapproachable vibe, like he’s more alien than human—he could easily report this kind of thing to the higher-ups. Sure, they probably wouldn’t expel me over a letter, but… Tarnovsky wouldn’t let this slide. I’d be stuck retaking crystal chemistry exams for eternity.
After scarfing down a few pastries at a café near the university, Lina and I trudged back to the dorm. I didn’t feel like doing anything except crawling under my blanket and passing out. I probably should’ve done just that, but instead, I pulled out the notebook from my nightstand where I’d drafted the letter and started reading.
"There’s something special about you. It makes me indulge myself every night, imagining you’re right there with me."
Seriously, Solomiya, seriously? What were you on when you wrote this?! It’s not even true! Well, okay… maybe once or twice, but definitely not every night!
Calm down! There’s nothing explicit here. The Humanoid wouldn’t even get it, right? He doesn’t understand human emotions, does he?
Skimming through the draft, I confirmed I hadn’t mentioned Vadim’s name even once, cringed three times at how much I’d hyped him up—way too much—and then froze when I reached the last paragraph. I couldn’t have written this! No way! Someone else must’ve added these lines in my handwriting to sabotage me! And then stuffed the letter into the wrong jacket!
"...Sometimes I look at your perfect physique and just want to press myself against it. I sit through lectures, imagining your strong hands touching me, holding me, then pushing me onto the bed. And there, desire takes over us both.
I think I’ve said enough about how I feel for you.
With deep admiration, Solomiya Pasichnyk!"
– Wowww, – Lina drawled beside me. When had she snuck over to peek at my draft? – Are you sure this was a love letter and not an invitation for a night with Vadim? And this ‘deep admiration’? Is that what I think it is?
– Go to hell, Lina, – I snapped in despair, tossing the notebook back into the drawer. I flopped onto the bed, covering my face with my hands.
– Sounds like you’re in full-on ovulation mode, – Lina declared, grabbing the notebook again. – All because you’ve got no man in your life. How long has it been?
– I don’t know, leave me alone. Let me die in peace.
– I’ve liked you since the very first class, – Lina began reading my letter aloud with dramatic flair. – So distant, so cold, yet insanely attractive… I bet you’ve got tons of admirers, and I’m just one of many. Maybe too ordinary. Maybe too plain for you, but I can promise I’m different. How? Well, you’ll have to find out for yourself…
– This is a nightmare, Lina! – I wailed, burying myself under a pillow. – God, please, let there be another Solomiya Pasichnyk at this university! Let the Humanoid throw the letter away, or get hit by a car and lose his memory! Let him lose it! Let him turn out to be illiterate! Let… let…
– Let things happen as they’re meant to, – Lina said philosophically. – Anyway, I told you Vadim’s a spoiled rich kid, way out of our league, and kind of dim, too.
– And Tarnovsky’s somehow on our level…
I whined a bit more, like a wounded puppy, before forcing myself to stop dwelling on this disaster and focus on studying. If there’s one thing I need now, it’s to know crystal chemistry inside and out.
***
I stopped breathing the moment he walked into the lecture hall. Striding to the podium, he greeted us with his usual frosty tone.
Biting my lip until it nearly bled, I hid behind my classmate Volodymyr, whose thick, curly hair provided decent cover. Even though the Humanoid probably wouldn’t recognize me—since he’d only been teaching us for two months and other instructors handled the labs—I wasn’t taking any chances.
– What’s he doing? – I whispered to Lina.
– Pulling something out of his fancy briefcase… It’s a small piece of paper…
– Is Solomiya Pasichnyk here? – his deep voice boomed like thunder, hitting me right in the chest.
I planned to keep hiding behind Volodymyr, but every single student turned to look at me, as if on cue.
– Sol, you’d better stand up, – Lina nudged me, – or he’s going to burn a hole through me with those fiery eyes. He probably thinks I’m you.
Rising slowly, nearly fainting, I glanced at the professor. His face showed no emotion, but I was still trembling like a rabbit in a wolf’s jaws.
– That’s me, – I mumbled so quietly that the Humanoid probably didn’t even hear.
– Please stay after the lecture.
And there it is. Death is near.
I nodded and sank back into my seat.
– I want, – I whispered to Lina, – to be buried in a white coffin…